One out of every four students falls victim to bullying during the school year, according to the National Center for Educational Statistics. Rosemary Brumbelow, Head of School and founder of Esprit International School in The Woodlands, has noticed that academic learning comes to a halt when bullies repeatedly display aggressive behavior towards other children, and learning won’t resume for the victim or the bully until both parties feel safe.

“The best way to have students feel safe and to be ready to learn is through a comprehensive program that focuses on changing the school climate and the social norms of the group,” Brumbelow said. “Adults have critical roles to play in helping to stop bullying, as do other children who witness or observe bullying.”

Esprit International School, a K-12 private school, bases their learning philosophy on the Montessori Method, a philosophy that helps students develop skills of independence and self-sufficiency, setting the foundation for a future generation who will contribute responsibly in a global community. Esprit offers specialized programs and personalized attention; areas where public schools too often lack. This helps students further develop essential real-world abilities that are frequently overlooked by higher-end private preparatory schools, such as how to resolve conflict and how to end bullying.

“Bullying is not the same thing as conflict,” Brumbelow said. “During Bullying Prevention Awareness month in October, we encouraged our students and teachers to understand the difference between conflict and bullying, to become more aware of the serious consequences of bullying and to learn more about what each of us can do to prevent bullying.”

As part of the school’s ongoing bullying prevention approach, Brumbelow offers three ways to resolve conflict between students:

• Focus Students on Social/Emotional Learning – Thanks to its small size, teachers at Esprit will notice and observe issues that are happening in real time. For example, a teacher may notice a group of girls playing outside and excluding one of the girls, Michelle, from the group. In this situation, the educator would speak to all involved to determine the role that each member of this group has played within the social interaction. Each member of the group is asked to evaluate how they are looking at each other from a humane perspective and to put themselves in the other’s shoes. During the conversation, Michelle admits, “I was not invited to Sally’s party and my feelings were hurt. I lashed out repeatedly and aggressively to the group and now they won’t include me when they are playing anymore.” In hearing each perspective, an opportunity for understanding surfaces. When students begin to view another person in another way, instead of labeling or targeting them, they begin to self-reflect. As the group begins to understand what’s happening, relationships are built and strengthened. 

• Sit Students Down to Work Out the Issue Themselves – Because of the nature of the program, students are encouraged to share and talk things out. To propagate this ideal, Esprit created an area where teachers can mediate a discussion between students to discover the core root of the issue. It is vital that students possess the skills to facilitate conflict resolution through constructive conversations.
  
  In our example, the girls would have met together in the conversation area with a teacher to facilitate the discussion. The group would be encouraged to sit down, listen to each other and to effectively work through the issue using role play and the “I” message approach. Each member of the group would be asked why Michelle was not invited to the party and asked to work through key statements. Michelle might say to the Sally, “My feelings were hurt when you didn’t invite me to the party and I don’t think you meant to do that.” Sally might respond back, “I was told that I could only invite six people over for the party. It wasn’t my intention to leave you out.”

• Teach Students How to Deal with Real-World Conflict – During these facilitated discussions, teachers encourage the group to speak directly to the core person who is being aggressive, instead of talking to others about the situation. The goal of these discussions is to ensure that the core issue that is impacting the group gets heard by all. By taking this approach, students learn how to resolve conflict and end bullying.

“Research has proven that bullying can be extremely serious.,” said Brumbelow. “Kids who are bullied can experience long-term negative physical, school, and mental health issues. At Esprit, we stop bullying as soon as it is noticed.”

“Along with our educators, parents also need to keep an eye out for the warning signs that their child is being bullied, such as Unexplainable injuries, Lost or destroyed clothing, books, electronic, or jewelry or Difficulty sleeping or frequent nightmares,” Brumbelow said. The educators at Esprit International School, located at 4890 W. Panther Creek in The Woodlands, are dedicated to providing each student with a balanced and diverse education in a safe, supportive environment that promotes self-discipline, motivation and excellence in learning. Call 281-298-9200 to discuss your student’s education journey or visit www.EspritInternationalSchool.com.